Sunday, 22 December 2024

THE CHRISTMAS HORROR ADVENT CALENDAR - Door 22: You'd Better Watch Out!


So then, after a little flurry of seasonal shockers, after The Children, once again it all went quiet again, with 2009 being another fallow year for Christmas horror. However a new decade would open with not one, but two bad Santa movies. And here I am not talking about maniacs dressed as Father Christmas going on a slasher killing spree. Rather these bad Santas were ancient spirits of Christmas, and in this pair of movies we were presented dark mythologies which revealed the sinister truth about dear old Santa Claus. 

Now it should be noted that around this time, there had been a growing awareness that Santa Claus wasn’t always the same festive figure we know today, and earlier versions had some dark variations. For just as dark and unsettling folk tales were sanitised to become our  modern sweetness-and-light fairy tales, so too various Santa Claus traditions in old Europe had some darker elements which we have forgotten. And in the early years of the 21st century, much of this lore was rediscovered and was rapidly disseminated by the internet, with dozens of articles on Santa’s dark helpers such as Krampus and Black Pete, who punished the wicked while St. Nick handed out presents to the good. Also very popular at the time were various theories - now discredited by the way - that interpreted Santa as a shaman, a pagan god, or a folk horror wild man. 


Now while much of this chatter about old dark Christmases was highly inaccurate, and often historically dubious, this swirl of ideas associating Santa with ancient dark forces certainly inspired today’s two movies, however perhaps very wisely, both opted to create their invented ancient lore. 

First up we have Sint, also known as Saint and St. Nicholas. Having its premiere on Halloween night at the  Razor Reel Fantastic Film Festival in 2010, the movie then went on general release on 10th November, and usually for a Dutch movie, gained an international release as well. It was made by veteran Dutch director Dick Maas who previously had enjoyed success outside the Netherlands with The Lift in 1983, about a high tech elevator which develops a murderous mind of its own, and Amsterdamed in 1988, a horror thriller which was effectively a Dutch giallo. 

However with Sint, Dick Maas crafted a uniquely Dutch Christmas horror.  And before we get to the movie, here’s a quick crash course on the Netherlands' Yuletide traditions. In Holland, while now there are usual Christmas celebrations at the end of December, traditionally the gift giver was St. Nicholas himself - Sinterklaas as he is known there, which is where we get the name Santa Claus. The feast day of St. Nicholas is 6th December, and traditionally Sinterklaas therefore makes his rounds on the night before, on 5th December. Much like our Santa, he comes down chimneys and leaves gifts for the good, but he has a helper, Black Pete, who is so called because he is covered in soot from the chimneys. Also it is Black Pete who carries off the especially naughty children in sacks! And for more on this and other old traditions do check out my In Search of Santa podcast series


Sint opens in the year of our lord 1475, a corrupt bishop Niklas is terrorising the land with his band of thugs, sailing in their galleon from place to place and effectively pillaging whole towns.  However on the night of 5th of December, one village - which one day will become Amsterdam - takes revenge. The locals steal out in the dead of night, and by the light of a full moon, and they set fire to Niklas’s galleon burning all aboard to death. 

However that is not the end of it, for there is a dark legend that whispers whenever there is a full moon, the evil Niklas and his horde of Black Petes, now semi-incinerated undead thugs, rise from the grave to murder and pillage in Amsterdam once more. And this year, the moon will be full again, and a police detective, Goert, played by Bert Luppes, knows the legend is true as his own family was murdered when he was a boy when the moon was last full on the eve of St. Nicholas.  Meanwhile two teens Frank, played by Egbert Jan Weeber and his girl friend Lisa, played by Caro Lenssen will also cross paths with Goert and learn the horrific truth behind the legend of Sinterklaas. 


Sint is a terrifically fun movie and a feast of both festive fun and Christmas horror. To begin with Amsterdam, at Christmas time and blanketed in slow falling snow looks fantastic. The undead Niklas, played by Huub Stapel, looks fantastic, in particular as he gallops through a snowy Amsterdoam on his white horse causing all manner of bloody mayhem. Then we have his Black Petes, all burnt zombie pirates who dish out violent and gory deaths galore. However, as well as a generous helping of supernatural mayhem, Dick Maas gives us interesting and engaging characters with their own story arcs, and tells his tale with a good deal of wit and humour. Sint is a wild ride that gleefully dashes through the snow of a Dutch Christmas, merrily lopping off heads as it goes, and here at Hypnogoria Towers, it is now an annual tradition to watch this gem of a movie every 5th December.   

Now Sint in itself would have made 2010 a landmark year for Christmas horror all on its own, but then on 3rd December we got another treat! Now as I alluded to earlier, the Netherlands has an important link to Santa Claus through St. Nicholas, but as every child knows, another country closely associated with the Jolly Old Elf is Lapland, where some say he makes his home. And so drawing on old legends of the lands of the north comes Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale from Finland.


Released on 3rd December 2010, Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale is a movie written and  directed by Jalmari Helander. Now the movie was inspired by two short movies Helander has made previously -  Rare Exports, Inc.  in 2003 and its sequel Rare Exports: The Official Safety Instructions. Now I can’t really tell you another about either of these festive but darkly humorous shorts as that would involve spoilers for the full feature movie which is perhaps a prequel of sorts to them. And indeed, while they can be found online, I would recommend seeing the full movie first. 

So what of the film itself? Well the story revolves around a young boy, Pietari (played by Onni Tommila) who lives in Korvatunturi in the Finnish region of Lapland, with his father Rauno (played by his real life dad Jorma Tommila). His mother has passed away, and father and son are finding things increasingly hard as Christmas approaches. An American team is excavating the peak of Korvatunturi, and since work has begun, strange things have been happening in the local area. Studying old books, Pietari learns of an old legend that tells of the original Santa, a huge ogre of the man with horns who ravaged the land. The Sami people grew tired of his reign of terror and trapped the ancient monster in ice, which in time became the peaks of Korvatunturi. And our young hero suspects that the excavations there are going to unleash something very old and very dangerous…


Now Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale is a truly magical movie. It is beautifully shot, immersing you in the glorious wild beauty of Lapland, much like the last Finnish Christmas horror we spoke about, The White Reindeer. However, like Sint, it also draws on traditional local Christmas legends about Santa. There he is known as Joulupukki, the Yule Goat, and was a much more terrifying looking figure, a horned humanoid dressed in furs, before his image was softened and brought more in line with the Santa we know today. Rare Exports draws on these older traditional depictions of Joulupukki, and again like Sint, uses them as springboard to create a new mythological tale revealing ancient and dark origins for our familiar cosy Father Christmas. 

But do be warned, when I said it was a magical movie, I was referring to the magic of old folklore and legends rather than modern fairy tales, for there are some very dark things occurring in Rare Exports. But that said, this is still a proper Christmas tale, there is light as well as the darkness, for at its heart, it is the story of how a young boy sets out to save both his family and Christmas itself as well. And hence despite some unsettling scenes, Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale does live up to its full  title, and delivers a finale that will fill you up with the spirit of the season.  


In another of these little Christmas coincidences, once again we got two movies released in the same year that make a perfect festive double bill! And indeed, both are high recommends for any lovers of Christmas horror. 

DIRECT DOWNLOAD -  Door 22: You'd  Better Watch Out!


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